Major life changes can feel overwhelming for parents, especially when you’re watching your little one navigate unfamiliar territory. Whether it’s starting childcare, welcoming a sibling, or moving homes, these transitions often leave parents wondering how to best support their child through the uncertainty. The good news? With the right understanding and approach, you can help your child not only cope with change but actually thrive through it.
Today, we’re speaking with James Mitchell, an Inclusion Specialist with a Masters in Inclusive Education, who has dedicated his career to ensuring every single child, regardless of their abilities or background, has the support they need to flourish. James brings a unique perspective to helping children cope with change, combining his expertise in trauma-informed practice with deep experience supporting diverse families through life’s biggest transitions. His approach aligns beautifully with evidence-based strategies that focus on building resilience rather than simply managing difficulties.
Meet James: Bridging Inclusive Education and Family Support
James’s journey into specialising in childhood transitions began during his early career in mainstream education, where he noticed how differently children responded to changes in their environment. “I realised that traditional one-size-fits-all approaches weren’t serving the diverse range of children and families I was working with,” he explains. Over the past decade, James has worked extensively with families in areas like Springvale, supporting children with varying abilities and cultural backgrounds through major life changes. His trauma-informed approach recognises that every child processes change differently, and his goal is always to create flexible support systems that honour these individual differences whilst building family confidence.
Q: How can parents distinguish between normal adjustment responses and concerning reactions when their young child faces a major change?
A: This is such an important question, and one that keeps many parents awake at night. The key is understanding that some regression and emotional responses are completely normal—in fact, they’re often signs that your child is processing the change in healthy ways.
Normal adjustment typically includes temporary changes in sleep patterns, perhaps some clinginess, or even regression in skills like toilet training or speech. You might notice your confident walker suddenly wanting to be carried more, or your chatty toddler becoming quieter for a few weeks. These responses usually peak within the first two weeks of a change and gradually improve as your child adapts.
What I encourage parents to watch for are signs that suggest your child might need additional support. These include persistent changes that extend beyond four weeks, such as ongoing sleep difficulties, significant changes in appetite, or withdrawal from activities they previously enjoyed. If your child is showing repetitive behaviours that seem compulsive, or if you notice developmental regression that doesn’t begin to improve after the initial adjustment period, it’s worth seeking guidance.
Remember, every child learns differently, and our goal is to create a flexible environment that honours that. Trust your instincts—you know your child best. If something feels concerning to you, it’s always appropriate to reach out for professional support or discuss your observations with your child’s educators.
Q: What trauma-informed preparation strategies do you recommend for major transitions like starting childcare or moving homes?
A: One of the key principles of inclusion is meeting children where they are, and this applies beautifully to preparation strategies. I always start by acknowledging that transitions activate our child’s stress response system—this isn’t something to prevent, but rather something to support mindfully.
For starting childcare, I recommend beginning preparation at least two weeks before the transition. Create a simple visual story about their upcoming experience—photos of the centre, their educators, and the daily routine work wonderfully. Read this story together daily, allowing your child to ask questions and express feelings without pressure to be excited.
The power of connection cannot be overstated. If possible, arrange short visits to the childcare centre before the official start date. Let your child explore the environment whilst you’re present, creating positive associations. Bring a comfort item from home—a small blanket or family photo—that will provide continuity between their two worlds.
For home moves, involve your child in age-appropriate ways. Let toddlers pack a special box of toys, or have preschoolers help choose which bedroom will be theirs. Create a countdown calendar, but keep it simple and visual. Most importantly, maintain routines wherever possible. If bedtime always includes three stories and a song, keep this consistent even when everything else feels different.
The goal isn’t to eliminate all stress, but to provide scaffolding that helps your child feel secure whilst building their confidence in navigating new experiences.
This preparation approach aligns with the Early Years Learning Framework’s emphasis on transitions as opportunities for learning and growth, rather than simply challenges to overcome.
Q: How can parents maintain secure attachment when family structures change, such as during separation, blended family formation, or a new baby’s arrival?
A: Secure attachment is like a child’s emotional anchor, and it’s absolutely possible to maintain this even during significant family changes. The foundation of secure attachment isn’t perfection—it’s about consistent, responsive relationships that help children feel seen and understood.
During family structure changes, I focus on what I call “emotional availability within chaos.” Your child needs to know that even though circumstances are changing, your love and commitment to them remains constant. This means being present during the difficult moments, acknowledging their feelings, and providing predictable comfort.
For new siblings, prepare your child by involving them in the pregnancy journey in developmentally appropriate ways. Let them feel the baby kick, help set up the nursery, or choose a special book to read to their sibling. After the birth, create one-on-one time that’s protected and predictable—even ten minutes of focused attention can reinforce that bond.
In separation or blended family situations, consistency between homes becomes crucial. We partner closely with families and allied health professionals to create communication strategies that work. Simple things like maintaining similar bedtime routines, using the same comfort objects, or even having both parents use similar language when talking about feelings can provide stability.
Remember that children often express attachment anxiety through behaviour rather than words. Increased tantrums, sleep disruptions, or clinginess aren’t defiance—they’re communication. Respond with empathy: “You’re feeling worried about all these changes. I’m here with you, and we’ll figure this out together.”
The beautiful thing about secure attachment is that it’s never too late to strengthen it, and children are remarkably resilient when they feel truly seen and supported.
Q: Many working parents feel guilty about childcare transitions. How do you address these concerns whilst supporting the child’s adjustment?
A: Parent guilt around childcare transitions is almost universal, and I want to start by saying that these feelings are completely normal. However, this guilt can actually interfere with your child’s adjustment if we’re not mindful about it.
Children are incredibly perceptive to our emotional states. If you’re approaching childcare with anxiety or guilt, your child will sense this uncertainty and may interpret it as a signal that this new environment isn’t safe. Instead, I help parents reframe childcare as an exciting expansion of their child’s world rather than a separation necessity.
Focus on the opportunities your child will gain: new friendships, engaging activities, different learning experiences, and the chance to develop independence skills. When you speak about childcare, use positive, confident language: “Tomorrow you get to play with your friends at childcare” rather than “Mummy has to go to work, so you have to go to childcare.”
Practically, create connection rituals that help both of you feel secure. Maybe it’s a special song you sing in the car, a goodbye hug sequence, or a small drawing you put in their lunch box. These rituals become anchors of connection that sustain your child throughout the day.
Also remember that quality childcare can actually strengthen your relationship with your child. Many parents find that having time to recharge—whether through work, self-care, or simply adult interaction—makes them more emotionally available when they’re with their children.
Trust that your child can thrive in multiple loving environments. High-quality early learning centres complement rather than compete with your parenting, providing experiences and perspectives that enrich your child’s development.
Research consistently shows that children can form secure attachments with multiple caregivers, and quality childcare experiences support rather than undermine family relationships.
Q: How do you adapt support strategies for children with different abilities or from diverse cultural backgrounds during major changes?
A: This question really gets to the heart of truly inclusive practice. Every child learns differently, and our goal is to create a flexible environment that honours that—including during times of change.
For children with different abilities, I start by understanding their unique communication and processing styles. A child with autism might need more detailed visual schedules and longer preparation times for transitions. We might create social stories that are highly specific, showing exactly what will happen, when, and with whom. For children with sensory sensitivities, I work with families to identify potential triggers in new environments and develop coping strategies in advance.
Children with developmental delays might need concepts broken down into smaller steps, with more repetition and celebration of incremental progress. The key is never to lower expectations, but to provide different pathways to success. We partner closely with families and allied health professionals to ensure strategies are consistent across all environments.
Cultural considerations are equally important. I’ve worked with families where extended family plays central roles in childcare, and Western models of “independence” might not align with their values. In these cases, I adapt strategies to honour family structures and cultural practices whilst still supporting the child’s adjustment.
For bilingual families, major changes can sometimes trigger temporary language regression or code-switching behaviours. This is completely normal—the child’s brain is processing the change whilst managing multiple language systems. I encourage families to maintain home language use and discuss the transition in whatever language feels most comfortable for the child.
The goal is always to build on the child’s existing strengths and family resources, creating support systems that feel authentic and sustainable for each unique family situation.
Building Your Child’s Resilience Through Change
Every child has the capacity to develop resilience through life’s transitions, but they need the right support and understanding to unlock this potential. As James reminds us, “Every child learns differently, and our goal is to create a flexible environment that honours that.” By approaching changes with patience, preparation, and a focus on connection, we can help our children see transitions not as threats to navigate, but as opportunities to grow.
Remember that your role isn’t to shield your child from all stress, but to provide the scaffolding they need to develop their own coping skills. Trust in their resilience, maintain your connection, and remember that with thoughtful support, major life changes can become powerful learning experiences that strengthen your child’s confidence and adaptability.
To learn more about our comprehensive childcare approach that supports children through all life transitions with trauma-informed, inclusive practices, Book a Tour. Contact True Maple Bilingual Early Learning Centre today at 03 7504 3524 or springvale@truemaple.com.au to see how our expert-led approach can support your family’s journey.